Ed's Justice
by jojoDO
Summary: Ed is an abusive jerk to his wife and child, and the rest of the camp isn't putting up with it. Rated T for language and Ed getting hurt a lot by pretty much everybody.
1. Chapter 1

Ed was sitting on top of the RV, smoking a cigarrette.

"I think I'm gon beat muh wife" he said in his hick voice then got off of the RV and commenced his search for Carol. But before he got far, he ran into Rick.

"Ed." Rick said with a slight nod. "Where you off to in such a hurry? You know it's your turn to be on lookout."

"I don't give a damn bout no lookout. I'm goin to beat muh wife." Ed spat.

A furious scowl spread across Rick's face as he whipped out his Python and struck Ed across the temple with it. Ed yelped and fell to the ground as Rick got on top of him and started hammering him with the butt of the pistol. After two minutes of bashing his head in, Rick finally got off of him and spoke.

"You're lucky the world's ended, otherwise I would put your worthless ass behind bars."

Rick then walked off without another word, leaving Ed coughing and spitting up blood.

 **TO BE CONTINUED**


	2. Chapter 2

Ed and Carol were loading supplies onto a pickup truck while the others gathered their own belongings. Daryl was a few feet away, working on Merle's motorcycle. Since his brother was gone, it was his now to do whatever he pleased. He was busy tighening a loose muffler when he noticed Ed yelling at Carol.

"Load faster! The damn apocalypse aint gone wait around for your slow ass!" he yelled as Carol started picking up things at a quickened pace. She was so nervous that she accidentally dropped Dale's toolbox on Ed's foot as she went to load it.

"OWW! WHAT THE F*** DID YOU DO THAT FOR, YOU CLUMSY BITCH!" Ed screamed. He then drew back his hand and unleashed it on Carol's face, knocking her to the ground. Having witnessed this, Daryl immediately jumped up and aimed his crossbow at Ed's left ass cheek. He let the arrow fly as it zoomed and struck it's intended target.

"YOOOOOOWWW MY ASS!" Ed yelled as he gripped his butt and started hopping. Daryl then ran behind him and whacked him in the back of the head with the crossbow. As Ed fell facefirst into the dirt, Daryl pulled the arrow out of his ass and stabbed it into his other cheek, earning another scream from the wife beater.

"Next time, it's goin upstairs!" Daryl yelled, kicking Ed in the ribs. He then spit a huge loogie on Ed's back and stormed off.


	3. Chapter 3

Shane and Jim were busy trying to fix a car Rick and Glenn had stolen from the city. Jim seemed to know what he was doing; Shane just leaned in with a serious expression to make it look like he was helping. As the two of them worked, Shane noticed Ed and Sophia coming out of their tent.

"Hey Ed, lemme talk to you man." Shane said aloud, not even looking up. Ed rolled his eyes and walked over to where the two men were working. Sophia tried to follow him, but he shoved her backwards and told her to go wait for him.

"What the hell you wont?" Ed sneered. Shane finally looked up at Ed, getting in his face.

"Lemme ask you sumptin... did you lay hands on your daughter this morning?" he asked, a scowl on his face.

"Maybe, so what if I did. I don't see how it's nunna yo bidness." Ed spat. Shane turned away from him and looked at Jim.

"Hey Jim, you were a father weren't you? What'chu think about this situation?" he asked the solemn man. Jim poked his head up, wiping sweat from his brow.

"I think it's a goddamn disgrace and Ed deserves an ass beating or three." he said, adjusting his hat. Shane looked back at Ed.

"So, lemme ask you again... you lay hands on your daugher?"

"Yeah."

Shane drew his fist back and slammed it into Ed's nose. Ed yelped and tumbled to the ground as Shane started kicking him repeatedly. Jim joined in with a baseball bat which he unleashed on Ed's body with several overhead swings. Once the beating was over, Ed couldn't move from the pain. All he could do was groan. The two of them resumed their work.


	4. Chapter 4

Andrea and Carol were down by the pond, laughing and joking as they gossiped and washed clothes together.

"You're kidding. DALE? Dale is like a... father to me. Or, maybe a fun uncle." Andrea said as she playfully slapped Carol's shoulder.

"Yeah, well I'm just telling it like I saw it. Dale was totally checking you out." Carol said with a raised eyebrow and a grin.

"Maybe he just thought I was a walker. He was looking at me for a few extra seconds to make sure I was a good guy." Andrea said before scoffing at her own stupid theory.

"Oh, will you listen to yourself?" Carol asked, laughing and rolling her eyes. "Let's face it... Dale's an old pervert."

The two of them started laughing wildly as they dropped their washboards and the clothes they were holding.

"Hey, why don't you shut the hell up?" a familiar douchebag-sounding voice suddenly said. "You givin me a damn headache."

As soon as she heard the voice, Carol was silent. Andrea just rolled her eyes and turned to face the source of the voice.

"Ed... go to hell." she spat.

Ed growled and put out his cigarette. He walked down to the pond and grabbed Carol's arm forcefully, earning a yelp from the poor woman.

"Hey! What are you doing?" Andrea yelled, getting up in his face,

"Fun's over. You're little playmate is comin to keep me company." Ed said with a sadistic grin.

"Ow! Ed... you're hurting me." Carol said meekly.

"Did I say you could talk!" Ed yelled. He jerked her arm so forcefully that she fell on the ground. Andrea had seen enough.

"Ed, you are out of LINE!" she yelled as she slapped Ed in the face. Ed shoved her so hard that she fell in the water.

"That's what you get, you blonde bitch." Ed sneered as he dragged Carol back to his tent. But before he could do anything to her, he suddenly had to pee.

"Aw hell" he muttered. He turned to Carol and put his finger in her face.

"You move from this spot and you'll regret it later." he said firmly and walked out of the tent. Carol sat down and started silently sobbing.

"He did WHAT?" Dale asked, putting down his rifle.

"Look, I'm fine okay? But could you just do something for me, Dale? For Carol?" Andrea asked. She leaned in and whispered in his ear. As she whispered, she noticed Ed walking to the woods.

"Look, there he is now." she pointed. Dale picked up his rifle and nonchalantantly looked around. He started to whistle a little and suddenly he gasped.

"Gee! Andrea will you look at that buck!" he said, pointing his rifle at Ed who was taking a piss.

"Why, I bet that's a... 10 pointer at least." he said as he winked to a giggling Andrea. He pointed the scope directly at Ed's asshole.

"Don't let it get away, Dale." Andrea whispered with a smirk. Dale nodded and, after taking a deep breath, gently squeezed the trigger. A scream echoed through the camp as Ed fell on his side and clutched his ass. He rolled around in the dirt and howled with pain.

"Thanks Dale." Andrea whispered and gave him a peck on the cheek. Dale smiled as he enjoyed the show Ed was putting on in the woods. Nobody ever came to help him.


	5. Chapter 5

Eventually, the camp was attacked and most of the group were killed. Ed was still alive unfortunately, and Carol survived as well. Their daughter was killed by walkers along with the others. The remaining survivors moved to a farm run by a man named Hershel and his daughters. Unfortunately, with a smaller group, Ed's acting up became a lot more noticeable.

"Man, I'm so damn bored. Where the hell's muh damn wife?" Ed grumbled as he worked on his fourth cigarette. Suddenly, he saw Maggie walk by. A grin spread across his face as he admired her firm ass. He got an even better view when she accidentally dropped her basket of peaches and bent over to pick them up one by one.

"Hey Ed." a voice suddenly said from behind. Ed jumped and quickly turned around to come face to face with none other than Glenn, who had a look of vengeance on his face.

"Whut the hell you wont, Chinaman?" Ed said gruffly, his breath causing Glenn to flinch.

"I saw you looking at Maggie." Glenn said, venom dripping from each word. "You know I'm going out with her now."

"Yeah, so what? What she see in your scrawny ass anyway? She needs a real man." Ed said, grinning. Glenn's expression only grew more fierce.

"Don't you care if Carol finds out you're ogling other women?"

"Hell naw. I don't give a damn bout that bitch anyway. Hell, if she'da got eaten back at the camp I'd finally be free to-"

Glenn cut him off by throwing a roundhouse kick to his face. Ed's cigarette fell out of his mouth as he fell on his back. Glenn started kicking him in the stomach repeatedly, knocking the breath out of him.

As Glenn beat the crap out of Ed, T Dog walked by whistling a tune. As he stopped to laugh at Ed's misfortune, Glenn stopped kicking and turned to face his friend.

"Hey T Dog!" he called. "You wanna join in?" A look of excitement spread across T Dog's face.

"AWW HEEEELL YEAH!"

T Dog excitedly ran over to Glenn and joined in kicking the wind out of Ed's body. After 10 minutes they finally stopped kicking him.

"That's for looking at my girlfriend and just being a jackass that nobody likes!" Glenn shouted in his face. As he and T Dog walked off, he turned around one more time.

"And I'm telling Carol!"

"Gwone then! See if I f***ing care." Ed said with a groan. As he laid on the ground to recover, Hershel walked by in his overalls and straw hat. He was carrying a shotgun. He seemed to be looking for someone, and when he finally saw Ed he frowned and approached the man.

"I've been looking for you." Hershel said. "Bethy says you touched her backside this morning."

Ed looked up at the old man with his usual asshole face.

"Yeah, so what? Whatchu gone do bout it, you old-"

Hershel interrupted Ed by blasting his kneecap full of buckshot. Ed screamed so loud the whole camp could hear. When Rick and Shane heard it, they both started laughing and gave each other a high five.

"The wrath of God has nothing on a father of three girls, you little bitch." Hershel said in the most badass voice ever. As he walked away, Ed flipped him off before passing out from the pain.


	6. Chapter 6

Eventually the farm was overrun, and the group was whittled down to the bare minimum; only 11 remained now. To everyone's displeasure, by some cruel, sick twist of fate, Ed was still alive. He had only gotten meaner and more obnoxious, and everyone was sick of him at this point. Even his own wife was no longer afraid of him, just annoyed by his behavior like the others. He still hit her, but she took it and wouldn't give him the pleasure of seeing her cry.

"Man, uh can't believe uhm outta damn cigarettes" Ed grumbled as he put out his last Marlboro. He sat down on the bed of his prison cell and sighed heavily.

"I can't believe that f***ing dumbass Rick moved us to a prison." Ed grumbled, completely ungrateful to the man who helped them survive all winter.

"Where's muh damn wife? I need somethin to take my mind off of this shit."

Ed got up and walked out of the cell. To his surprise, he bumped into none other than Carol herself. Ed smiled sadistically at her, but she kept a stone face and didn't flinch.

"Ed." she said with a nod, still maintaining her cool demeanor.

"I've been lookin for ya. Why don't you come keep me company for awhile?" Ed said, with his sick grin still plastered on his face.

"I need to say some things to you. Things I haven't had a chance to say since the farm." Carol said to him, still unflinching. Ed threw his hands up and sighed with annoyance.

"Fine then, woman! Just don't talk my damn ear off!"

"First of all, I am apalled that you wouldn't mourn the death of your own daughter." Carol said firmly.

"Hell with that girl. All she did was scream and cry everytime a tree rustles." A pained expression started to form on Carol's face.

"And then, Glenn told me you were looking at and groping other girls. We took vows, for God's sake Ed! How could you do this to me?" she asked, her voice breaking a little. She held up her hand, revealing her ring: the same ring he gave to her many years ago.

"Doesn't this mean anything to you?" she said, her voice breaking even more.

"Holy shit, you still have that?" Ed asked with an amazed expression. "I sold mine on Ebay."

Carol looked away, her face twisting, but she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She then turned back to Ed with her face solid.

"You got sumtn else you wawna waste muh time with?" Ed grunted. Carol took a deep breath and gave Ed a look of pure hatred.

"Yes, there is one more thing. I'm not putting up with your bullshit anymore."

Ed almost fell backwards at hearing those words. He put on his angry douchebag face and got closer to her.

"Whut the hell you say to me, woman?" he whispered ominously.

"My name is CAROL!" she screamed in his face, causing him to back up. "And you heard me loud and clear, Ed. But just in case you didn't, read my lips: Go. F***. Yourself."

Ed had heard enough. He shoved her up against a wall and raised his fist.

"That's it, you done f***ed up now, bitch!"

He swung with all his might at Carols face, but she ducked under his punch and his fist hit solid concrete. Ed's scream echoed throughout the prison as he clutched his now broken hand. Carol took this moment of confusion to kick him square in the testicles. Tears poured down Ed's face as his knees buckled and he fell to the ground. He tried to hold his nuts, but Carol pried his hands apart and started stomping his nuts furiously. She stomped for five straight minutes before finally letting go. As Ed rolled around on the floor in pain, she got in his face.

"And by the way, I've been f***ing Daryl all winter." she said, then removed her ring and threw it in his face. She walked off, leaving her husband a broken man in more ways than one.


	7. Chapter 7

Life at the prison was tough; significant losses were sustained despite the fortification. Rick lost his wife Lori as well as T Dog, a beloved member of the group. Carol also was presumed dead, but no body was ever found. Hershel was bit on the ankle and had to be amputated. Even with the addition of the convicts Axel and Oscar, the group was at its weakest. The only ray of hope seemed to be Rick's new baby girl Lori died birthing.

On top of all that had happened: Ed was still around. Having lost the only person left in his life, Ed did nothing all day but lash out at people and generally just put everyone in a bad mood when he entered the room. Needless to say, everyone's displeasure of Ed had reached it's peak.

"I'm calling this emergency meeting because... I have to make a choice." Rick said softly to the remaining group. Everyone sat around, eagerly awaiting Rick's words.

"I'm sure you've all seen it... what an asshole he's become. Even his own wife didn't want to put up with him anymore. But aside from that, let's face facts here... he's contributing nothing to this group."

"That's an understatement." Glenn said in agreement. "All he does all day is eat and be a jerkoff to everybody."

"I say it's bout time we do sometin bout it." Daryl chimed in. "Ed needs to be cut loose."

"That's exactly what I had in mind." Rick said. "So... any ideas how we go about this?"

"Go bout what?" a voice echoed from behind. The group turned around and saw Ed, who was munching on the very scarce supply of potato chips.

"Whut the hell yall havin a meetin fer without me?" Ed said in an obnoxious tone.

"Actually, we were just about to call you in here." Rick replied. "Come have a seat," he said and motioned to the table. Ed threw the bag of chips on the ground and plopped down at the table. Rick got closer to him.

"Look, it's not easy to say this-"

"Yes it is," Hershel interrupted. Rick looked at him and put his hand up as if to say 'just let me talk'. He turned back to Ed.

"Ed, I'm just gonna be blunt. We put up with your shit in Atlanta, we put up with your shit at the farm, and we've put up with it here as well. But we are surviving day to day here, and I don't have time to deal with your ass anymore. All you're good for is being an ass to people and consuming our resources. Let's face it, you're dead weight. This ends now."

Ed quickly rose from his seat and slammed his hands on the table.

"Whut the hell you sayin?! You kickin me out, you pig?"

Rick shot to his feet as well and got inches from his face.

"That's exactly what I'm saying. Now we can do this the easy way, or you can get your ass beat and thrown over the fence."

Ed swung at Rick, but Rick ducked underneath the punch and delivered a devastating punch to Ed's gut. As Ed hunched over from the pain with a wheeze, Rick grabbed his shirt and threw him on the table. After punching him in the face a few times, Rick slung him off the table and onto the cold hard concrete.

"Let's give this bastard what he deserves." Rick said to everybody as they all circled Ed and started beating the shit out of him. Rick and Daryl kicked him in the face, Glenn and Maggie kicked him in the stomach, Beth stomped on his kneecap while Carl kicked him in the nuts. Hershel whacked him with a crutch while Axel and Oscar took baseball bats to his shins. The beatdown lasted an hour.

"Alright, he's had enough. Axel, Oscar, Daryl, help me pick him up." Rick commanded. The four of them scooped him up and carried him to the fence. At the count of 3, they carried his limp body up a ladder and dumped him over the high fence. Walkers immediately started swarming him, but Rick and the others decided to be human beings and give Ed a fighting chance. They took out all of the walkers that lunged at him.

"There. Now stay the hell away from our prison." Rick said to him before turning around and heading back inside. Ed coughed and wheezed for a few seconds before getting to his feet. He turned around and flipped off the prison.

"Fine! I don't need y'all's worthless asses anyway! I can do fine on muh own!" he shouted before walking away from the facility, not looking back.


	8. Chapter 8

Ed stumbled around the woods, feeling like a total loser. His group cast him out; now he had nothing. No food, no water, no roof over his head. He didn't even have a weapon.

"Hell with dem people" Ed grumbled, picking up a rock and throwing it with anger. "Throwin me out like that. It ain't right. They'll burn in hell, the whole lot of em."

Ed let out a sigh as he leaned up against a tree. He seemed oblivious as to why they would even consider throwing him out, but that only proved what a douchebag he truly was; he didn't even have the dignity to own up to all of his wrongdoings.

"Well fine then!" Ed yelled to himself. "I'll just find a new bitch, one that doesn't smart off at me and knows her place. To hell with that woman. Uh... I think it was Carol."

As Ed walked around aimlessly, he came across an African American woman with long dreadlocks who seemed to be wandering around aimlessly as well. She was slender and had a nice figure, but her main features were the katana on her back and the scowl on her face. As she got closer to Ed she finally stopped and stared at the hick man, anticipating his next move. Ed grinned obnoxiously as he looked her up and down, earning a look of disgust from the woman.

"Hey baby," Ed said to her. "Why don't I show you MY sword? I bet it's bigger'n yours."

The woman drew her blade in a flash and sliced Ed's head off.

 **THE END**


End file.
